April 22, 2010

"Save the world! Save the world! But first … let's crush someone's dreams!"

"And whose dreams were crushed tonight? All those teen girls who dig Tim Urban, that's who."

***

Did you watch the show last night, the "American Idol Gives Back" charity night? They had a lot of big stars performing, and too bad we don't get to vote them out. They were all awful. I didn't enjoy one of them. Not Alicia Keys, not Elton John, not the Black Eyed Peas, not Jeff Beck w/ Joss Stone... not anybody. Why are they all so bad? At least the regular contestants have a reason for being as bad as they are. And, as noted, you do get to see them — all but one — rejected in the end.

27 comments:

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Why are they all so bad?

Because a good live performance is rare now... mediocrity is the new normal.

Peano said...

Jeffrey Goldberg writes: "I still like long magazine articles. And with the torrent of shit raining down on us from the blogosphere, I appreciate the Atlantic and the New Yorker as places where someone has gone to the trouble of clearing out the shit."

Blog posts like this one are what he's talking about.

KCFleming said...

That Black Eyed Peas performance was painful; a musical version of irritable bowel syndrome.

As for Elton John, well, he was OK, now that he's doing a lounge lizard version of himself. But what's with the video of Elton Doing Important Work in the background? Yeesh.

Tank said...

Watched the Jeff Beck clip. Everything about that is painful to watch. How can people watch an hour of that? Pretty sure I'm way more stooopid than I was ten minutes ago.

For someone like Jeff Beck this is the wrong venue in every way.

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

More hollywood agitprop. 'Feed the public sector union machine --- or else. (that's what I heard, ok?)

Interesting when over-weight people are supposedly starving because they don't make enough money in a public sector job.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Black Eyed Peas are whistling dixie.

KCFleming said...

"Did you watch the show last night, the "American Idol Gives Back" charity night?"

Nope!
I watched the clips you provided, which helped me avoid that dreary task altogether.

The Althouse Filter is indispensable.
And with a low-priced attachment, it even makes julienne fries!

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Black Eyed Peas contributes to child obesity.

MadisonMan said...

Tim was very gracious at his (inevitable) ouster. Good for him.

I didn't watch.

garage mahal said...

They should have skipped Joss Stone and let Beck and his young bass phenom Tal Wilkenfeld tear it up.

master cylinder said...

Finally.... Tim is gone-he really sucked!
vote for the worst could only keep him going so long.

Amy said...

The music was bad - that's what the fast forward button is for - but the shameless pimping of the American poor was so horrific I sat paralyzed and unable to look away.
When I was young, it was said, "You can be poor but you can still be neat and clean." Apparently that attitude isn't prevalent any more. If I had even considered donating, I would NEVER do it after seeing the squalor people are living in voluntarily. And the obesity! Don't even get me started.

That county they said had 1 book for every 300 kids? How is that POSSIBLE? They showed the family with 3 books - so now we are supposed to believe that almost 1000 kids are without?
And the Mississippi family with the guy wearing his bluetooth headset in the clip? Don't the producers know what kind of impression that gives? Or is a bluetooth headset a human right now?

The African clips were certainly more legitimate. But whether monies donated get through the political nightmare to really affect change is questionable.

What a mess.

Unknown said...

For once I agree with garage. Beck was the only decent celeb musician. I zapped through most of the songs because they were so bad. When did having a melody become a bad thing? Light shows and skimpy glittery costumes read Vegas to me, not rock.

They put the fundraising with the show because the ratings wouldn't support 2 separate shows. I also resent these shows because of the "mosquito nets!" self-congratulation, ignoring the millions who died because we banned DDT, and because of fake stats like "food insecurity." It all seems frenzied; where is all the money going?

Smilin' Jack said...

I couldn't tell if Beck was in good form or not--I couldn't even hear him over that bitch's shrieking.

Unknown said...

What really disturbed me was Elton John ranting over testing and wearing condoms. Given the age this targets, and the age of many kids watching it (7,8- up), I was really at odds. Now my son is 13 (and was not watching), but I can see kids asking M&D "let me please see who gets booted". Now parents are facing a potential conversation that they should not have to be forced into while watching a 'family' show. True, should be done Elton - but the wrong forum... The Chief

MadisonMan said...

Now parents are facing a potential conversation that they should not have to be forced into while watching a 'family' show.

My own opinion is that any parent should welcome the opportunity to talk about sex with their kids. Why be squeamish? The time to talk is before they are teens, because they won't talk to you when they're teens.

The Crack Emcee said...

It was bad because I told you it was bad.

You're going to hear me, one day, young lady.

Trooper York said...

I always watch it on my DVR after the show is complete. My finger started to hurt from pressing the fast forward button to get past all those skinny ass kids.

Michael Haz said...

What's the matter with Elton John?

My wife, a pianist, pointed out that Elton's hands and arms were at the center of the piano, playing chords, while the sound of the piano included a much larger part of the keyboard being played.

It looked like he couldn't stretch his arms, and sounded like an unseen pianist was playing the notes on either end of the keyboard.

BJM said...

@ rdkraus: Exactly. They should pay us to watch such dreck.

The entire show was dreadful, even by Idol standards. I bailed and fast forwarded. I don't know who was more uncomfortable with poor people, Simon or Posh.

A long time Beck fan, I couldn't get past the muffin topped silver arm band clamped on his skinny flaccid bicep. Dude.

I kept thinking that Crystal would have done a much better rendition of "I'll Put A Spell On You," than Joss Stone. The backup singers made Stone's phony "blues" dialect so obvious that it was almost entertaining.

Elton John has become a parody of himself and his fidgeting with his belt buckle under his gut made me wonder if was he going whip it out or what?

Unfortunately he chose to sing.

Tim was obviously the next to go, but Big Mike's bombastic schmaltz fests have become so tedious that he has to go next.

Trooper York said...

I hope Big Mike goes soon but they have to get rid of that constipated Keebler elf Aaron Kelly.

I don't think you should stay on the show because you are the only person in America who is shorter than Seacrest and doesn't have a drawf show on TLC. It's just not right. Fair is fair.

Trooper York said...

Hey I bet you didn't know that Jeff Beck is Glenn Beck's father?

Christopher Smith said...

So true! I'm wondering if this is the fault of HD TV and hi-fi audio: we see and hear people as they really look, without the comfortable blurriness of old times that smoothed out voices and gave images a sense of mystery. When you see people in concert you're caught up in the excitement of the event (and they often have the speakers up so loud you can't here them anyway), but when you're at home watching in 1080 glorious lines of resolution, you can see just how lame everyone looks.

Bushman of the Kohlrabi said...

Wow. That was the biggest train wreck I've seen in quite some time. All the acts were bad. I actually had to switch channels while the Peas were on. It was unlistenable drivel.

On the contestant front, I think Tim suffered by improving over the last few weeks. The Vote for the Worst clan probably lost some of their enthusiasm. Now, Tim deserved to go but at least he was entertaining. Aaron, on the other hand, continually serves up bland karaoke. He needs to go next.

Ann Althouse said...

I let the DVR get out ahead and then fast-forward, but last night I didn't give it enough lead time. I couldn't put up with those professional acts.

Popville said...

Just watched the Beck/Stone clip (skipping to their perf), and Jeff's sweet Strat finesse made it not a complete waste.

Trooper York said...

I have always loved Mary J and she certainly made her cover of "Stairway to Heaven" her very own. She really showed what kind of artist she is...right Kara...right Kara....ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!!!!