May 17, 2008

Giambi's panties.

A gold lamé thong with a flame-line waistband.
"I had it over my shorts and stuff," [Derek Jeter] said. "I was 0-for-32 and I hit a homer on the first pitch. That's the only time I've ever worn it."

Johnny Damon also admitted donning the golden panties "probably three times."...

What is the secret of Giambi's golden thong?

"You're not worrying about your hands or your balance at the plate," Damon said. "You're worried about the uncomfortable feeling you're receiving."
Uncomfortable... because it's a thong or because you know it's gold lamé thong with a "flame-line" (whatever that is)?
Catcher Jorge Posada [said] that "a lot of players have worn it," but he didn't name names. Asked if the thong got washed between wearings, he gave a cringe-worthy answer. "Ask Jason," said Posada. "Jason is a little strange."
If the point is to make you uncomfortable, you shouldn't wash it.

ADDED: I fixed what was a misattribution of the first quote to Jason Giambi. Sorry.

59 comments:

Trooper York said...

You just want to piss me off and get Cyrus on your side don't you?

Hey both the Yankees and the Yankee fans are secure in our masculinity and the rituals and superstitions of athletes can be very weird. Wade Boggs always ate the same chicken dish before every game. Babe Ruth ate the same brand of hot dogs when he had a dozen before every game. Roger Clemens was injected in the ass with the same needle before every game. Wearing panties is just jock style ball busting. Plus if you were making what Giambi and Damon are making you would wear panties on your head if they helped you get a hit.

John Burgess said...

So, at least some Yankees are, literally, pantywaists! Who knew?

1775OGG said...

Damn Yankees!

vbspurs said...

Oh my GOD! NOOOOO!! *pecks out her eyes*

I haven't been this grossed out by a visual since I saw photos of Oscar De La Hoya in panties and a bra.

Or was that Prince Charles? Anyway, it was unpleasant.

Johnny Damon, you lamé-thong wearing traitor!

Cheers,
Victoria

Ruth Anne Adams said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
George M. Spencer said...

They'll never live it down in Boston.

Trooper York said...

The Yankees may wear panties but the Red Sox are pussies.

I'm Full of Soup said...

This is very very unusual I agree. Because Ann almost never posts on a sports topic.

Trooper York said...

The Yankees are not just sports. The Yankees are America.

Hey is that pompous enough for ya?

Lisa said...

You attribute the first quote to Giambi, but according to the story, it is Derek Jeter who wore the thong at 0 for 32.

Trooper York said...

Jeter also wore Mariah Carey as a hat to break out of a slump, big deal. Plus he gets more pussy than the port-a-potty at the Lillith fair.

titusreachoutandtouchfaith said...

The thought of Jorge Posada or Johnny Damon or Jason Giambi wearing that makes me hot and of course horny.

Some pictures would be nice.

I even like the fact that it may of not been washed.

titusreachoutandtouchfaith said...

Derek Jeter getting pussy-yumm.

Thanks for that picture Troop.

Derek Jeter getting pussy in a Port a Potty-yummier.

Ann Althouse said...

I have 72 posts with the tag "sports."

Also, I have blue eyes.

titusreachoutandtouchfaith said...

I would like to see the following Red Sox naked:

Manny Ramirez
Jacob Ellsbury
JD Drew
Gabe Kaplan-I don't know if he is still there but he is one hot jew
Justin Pedroya
Cocoa Crisp

If they were naked in a circle jerk it would be hotter.

Ann Althouse said...

Lisa, thanks. Fixed.

titusreachoutandtouchfaith said...

"Plus he gets more pussy than the port-a-potty at the Lillith fair"

Hilarious.

Alright, I forked off my 475.00 today for the Madonna concert. It was quite a bit of money but a requirement in my community.

titusreachoutandtouchfaith said...

Ted Kennedy has been hospitalized-they think it may be a stroke.

I know most don't like him here but i love him.

rcocean said...

George Steinbrenner is America?

I don't even consider him human.

vbspurs said...

I have 72 posts with the tag "sports."

Also, I have blue eyes.


I didn't get it. But now I got it. I really got it.

Cheers,
Victoria

Chip Ahoy said...

What's lamé?

*dog piles [+lamé +fabric]*

*dog piles [+brocaded]*

Oh. Sounds uncomfortable.

Chip Ahoy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Chip Ahoy said...

I forgot to add, Hahaha → ∞ .

Anonymous said...

Rose goes in the front guy, big guy.

Cyrus Pinkerton said...

This is my favorite Althouse blog entry ever!

Since the Yankees are in last place and Giambi is hitting .180, there doesn't seem to be too much magic in those gold panties. There wasn't much magic in Giambi's gold thong last year either since he hit only .236, but at least the Yankees were the best second place team money could buy in 2007.

Hey Trooper, maybe you should donate the Bucky Dent jockstrap you bought on eBay to the team. I'm confident you'll be able to comment without it, and with a little luck, it might help the Yankees crawl into fourth place by the All-Star break.

Trooper York said...

Of course George Steinbrenner is America. He’s loud and brash and demanding and successful but loses every once in a while. He will spend money to get the best. He’s not worried about what the European poofters are worried about (you know Red Sox cheese eating surrender monkeys), he just wants’ to win and will do what it takes. He is hated and vilified by the losers of this world, The Kansas City Royals like those inbred Brit royalty. The haughty John Kerry Masshole Red Sox like those dirty frogs. The hapless Milwaukee Brewers who had to switch leagues like the Pollacks jumping the Warsaw Pact to come to NATO. The Evil Empire, love it or leave it.

Trooper York said...

Cyrus don't you see what the Professor is doing? She's currying favor with you and the legion of Masshole Red Sox fans. Don't worry about the Yankees. We will be fine. We will strap on the jockstraps and the panties if necessary and see you in October.

Plus I am an old school Yankee fan, so I am wearing a Jake Gibbs
Jock, but thanks for asking.

Hey why is dating a feminist like Ted Williams?

No head.

Cyrus Pinkerton said...

Trooper,

It's hard to beat a good Ted Williams joke. Thanks, I'll share it with all of the fake Red Sox fans on the west coast who, of course, have no clue who Ted Williams is.

Just so you know, I'm not a Red Sox fan. Everyone who knows anything about baseball knows the Red Sox are pussies. Rooting for the Red Sox is almost as bad as rooting for the Yankees or the Dodgers.

For the Professor's sake, it would be nice if Wisconsin got a major league baseball team someday. The commissioner ought to be able to do something about that, but apparently it's beyond his ability. The owners really ought to bring back Fay Vincent; he knew how to handle George.

Trooper York said...

Well you see the problem is that when Bud Selig became commissioner, he put his daughter in charge of the Brewers. And you know that girls don't know anything about baseball.

Trooper York said...

Since you are in Austin, you must be a Texas Ranger fan. Thats as tough as it gets.

Where have you gone Lenny Randle, Frank Luchessi screams in vain?

I'm Full of Soup said...

72 out of what 10,000 posts?

That is fewer than 1% and I might say un-American for someone who calls herself an American blogger.

And are your blue eyes really blue? Or does one have to look at them from a certain angle?

Or was the blue eye crack a coded tip on the Preakness today? And will you make that race your 73rd sports post and how do we know that 72 is an accurate number? You maybe just pulled it out of Titus's butt.

I'm Full of Soup said...

Trooper:

Instapundit has named the NY state trooper investigation after you.

I'm Full of Soup said...

Time to get ready for the race. My nephew went to the race and I will call him to place a bet. Anyone have any tips? Don't tell me Big Brown - can't make money on his odds.

"Icabad Crane" I like that name.
Yankee Bravo - nah I hate the Yankees.
Gayego - sounds cool.

Hey Byrn, Stevil, Riley Tucker, Kentucky Bear and Racecar Rhapsody.

I just named all the horses picked to win, place or show by the NY Post staff.

I may go with Kentucky Bear.

Cyrus Pinkerton said...

Trooper,

No, I'm not a Texas Rangers fan and never will be. I was offered a job in Austin, a decent city, but unfortunately surrounded by Texas, which is a no-go zone.

It's true that Selig's daughter doesn't really know anything about baseball, but she still knows more than he does. As commissioner, Bud Selig has been worse than Bowie Kuhn. Plus, if you believe Fay Vincent's account, the reason we are stuck with the Dolt-in-Chief is because Selig outmaneuvered Bush to become MLB commissioner. (In my opinion, Bush would have done a lot better job as commissioner than Bud has done.)

Although I've heard of him, Lenny Randle is before my time. What position did he usually play when he was with the Yankees and who did he punch out in pinstripes?

My first memory of a Yankees second baseman is Steve Sax. I remember watching him play. Would you like to reminisce about Saxy?

ricpic said...

Wearing Mariah Carey as a hat gave Jeter a swelled head.

ricpic said...

All the money in the world and the Yankees pitching rotation ain't worth spit.

Trooper York said...

Good point about Bud. Just about anyone would have been better as witnessed by the steroid debacle.
Lenny Randle was utility guy who played third the most, but also second and short. He didn’t do much for the Yankees and he only choked his chicken on the ’79 Yankees when we had a bunch of knuckleheads like Reggie and was part of the team when Thurman crashed his jet. So he really minded his p’s and q’s because no one is interested in his bullshit.
Steve Sax was one of George’s worst decisions. He was a big name from the Dodger team that beat us and George always loved guys from other teams more than our own farm hands. The only distinction he could claim was that he couldn’t throw to first base and he was the twenty second guy on the Dodgers to have sex with Steve Garvey’s wife.

Hey it was the seventies.

ricpic said...

Mr. Perfect a cuckold?

Trooper York said...

Just imagine how history would of changed if Bush had been the commissioner instead of President.

We would invade the Dominican Republic.

No war for shortstops!

Halliburton would have replaced Harry M. Stevens Corp.

Did Dick Chaney know Lyman Bostock?

Bo Jackson would have got another scholarship in the No Man-child left behind program.

Philly Fanatic...waterboard the bastard

titusreachoutandtouchfaith said...

I love the BoSox.

I want Jonathan Pappelbaum to dance for me as we play that Boston song from The Departed-a move I absolutely loved.

Boston guys are really hot. There really bitchy too which makes them super hot. If they have the North Shore or South Shore accent it is a major plus.

Italian/Irish combo is lethal and amazinging hot and butch.

Imagine a million Matt Damon and Ben Affleck combos running around with their shirts off in a big club...and really drunk. Nothing better.

Cyrus Pinkerton said...

Santana pitches a mediocre game and the Yankees still lose. So much for the magic golden panties. It must really suck to be a Yankees fan today.

Lucky for you, Trooper, that Doyle isn't here to gloat, and that I'm far too kind to remind you that the Yankees are still in last place.

titusreachoutandtouchfaith said...

Boston has one of the largest jewish populations in the US which makes it really hot too.


Fabulous jewish hoods:

Brookline-divas
Newton-glamorous
Wellesley-fierce
Chestnut Hill-tres expensive.

Brandeis University-yummm

titusreachoutandtouchfaith said...

I lived in Cambridge, Somerville and the South End while in Boston.

I loved to just read the names on the mailboxes of my building:

Stein
Kaufman
Green
Lipman
Cohen
Dezube

I knew I was among society.

I could almost of popped a load just reading all the fabulous last names.

Trooper York said...

That's ok Cyrus, nice of you not to gloat but I am confident that the Yankees will be there at the end of the year. Right now we are trying to work some young guys in to the rotation. A-Rod and Jorge are out. The bats aren't working.
A couple of swallows does not a summer make. Or as Titus would say a couple of swallows does not a summer Saturday Night make.

Trooper York said...

Plus Doyle hasn't been around for months. I think Omar Mineya traded him for three guys from San Pedro De Marcos and two empanadas to be named later.

Kev said...

This wasn't directed at me, but I felt the need to respond:

Since you are in Austin, you must be a Texas Ranger fan. Thats as tough as it gets.

Not so much at the immediate moment. My Rangers (I've been in the Dallas area since college) are 21-22 (and absolutely spanked the cross-state rival Astros--my team as a kid--last night), and your Yankees are 20-23. We still have the heat of July and August to go, but they seem to have turned the corner a few weeks ago after a players-only meeting that followed a dreadful roadtrip.

Of course George Steinbrenner is America. He’s loud and brash and demanding and successful but loses every once in a while. He will spend money to get the best. He’s not worried about what the European poofters are worried about (you know Red Sox cheese eating surrender monkeys), he just wants’ to win and will do what it takes. He is hated and vilified by the losers of this world

Trooper, this Rangers fan may not like the Yankees, but he totally agrees with you here.

(Does anyone else wonder if Titus will chime in after I mentioned the Rangers spanking the Astros?)

reader_iam said...

I LOVE ME RED SOX!

(So nyah nyah nyah, trooperdoodle [flicks a spitball and then runs for the door] ... )

Trooper York said...

Well I understand reader; after all you have already confessed that you're a meathead.

reader_iam said...

That was already common knowledge, and that I nonetheless insist on freely consorting with the enemy.

Cyrus Pinkerton said...

Of course George Steinbrenner is America. He’s loud and brash and demanding and successful but loses every once in a while. He will spend money to get the best.

Let's not forget that Steinbrenner is also a convicted felon. In 1974, Commissioner Bowie Kuhn suspended Steinbrenner for two years in response to Steinbrenner's felony conviction. In 1990, Steinbrenner was banned from day-to-day operation of the team for life by Commissioner Fay Vincent for conduct unbecoming an owner.

Steinbrenner is a scumbag. He doesn't know baseball, and considering how much he spends on building the "best team money can buy," he's been remarkably unsuccessful.

Trooper York said...

Kev the problem with the Rangers is that heat of the summer always kills them dead. They need to go 28and O to be able to hold on like they did back in the day when we were beating them in the playoff's.
Course Juan Gonzo and Ivan were juicing it up bigtime back then.

Cyrus Pinkerton said...

I suppose that for Rangers fans, a .500 season is considered a huge success. However, they have no serious chance of winning the division title or qualifying for the playoffs as a wild card team.

In other words, although the Rangers may look better this year when they fail, they will still fail.

Trooper York said...

Well Cyrus, you haven't declared your team allegiance yet. Have they won as many pennants and world series during the same 30 year period as the Yankees? I think not. Money is just money. That's why Yankee fans gladly pay $6 for a hot dog and $8 for a beer.

And so what if he's a convicted felon. It's like you don't want him to vote or something. The way you talk about him, he could be a young black guy. Have some compassion. Don't stigmatize the guy just because he made some mistakes. It's a victimless crime after all. If illegal campaign contributions were really serious, most of Congress would be breaking rocks in Joliet even as we speak.

Jeeez you conservatives, never want to give an ex-con a break

Trooper York said...

Cyrus if you ever make it to New York, it would be my pleasure to take you to a Yankee game. Riding the 4 train till it bursts into the sunlight and you see the fans down below hurrying to the turnstiles. Stopping off at Stan’s for a few quick beers to be well lubricated before the first pitch. Getting your Billy Martin replica jersey. An intimate pat down by the security guard to make sure you don't have a rocket in your pocket. The voice of God (Bob Shepard) as he says “Welcome to Yankee Stadium.” Ordering more beers and cursing out the opposing team. Getting in a fist fight with the assholes in the next row who don’t appreciate your vocabulary. Having the security guards wrestle you out of the stands and tossing you out on your ass onto River Avenue.

Ahhhhh. Baseball Season.

You can’t beat it with a stick.

Kev said...

Trooper: Kev the problem with the Rangers is that heat of the summer always kills them dead.

Cyrus: In other words, although the Rangers may look better this year when they fail, they will still fail.

Who knows, guys. Everything has seemed different recently. I'll bookmark this page and quote it sometime in September, when either you guys or myself will be wrong. (And if I am wrong, at least the games are fun to attend, the heat notwithstanding. If we lose...so be it. Rangers fans are like Cubs fans with several decades less history.)

BTW, something pretty cool happened before the Rangers-Astros game earlier today.

Trooper York said...

Kev that is way cool. I hope the Rangers do well as I hate to see the Angels in the playoffs. So it would suit me down to the ground if Texas makes it instead of the Angels.

The problem with Texas is the problem with a lot of franchises. They don't really value their history, their heritage. Who are the old time Rangers that are still with the team as managers and coaches? Or broadcasters for that matter. They need to build a brand. That's what you really need. Have the old-timers instill Ranger Pride. All of old guys, Dean Palmer, Ruben Sierra and of course the unforgettable Crusty Rear.

Trooper York said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kev said...

Who are the old time Rangers that are still with the team as managers and coaches? Or broadcasters for that matter.

Actually, it's getting better:

Team president: Nolan Ryan
Executive VP, communications: Jim Sundberg (longtime former catcher)
TV broadcaster: Tom Grieve (former player and GM)

And Rusty Greer had a front-office job not too long ago.

Trooper York said...

Well that's great. You need the guys you grew up with to be around the team. Bobby Murcer was the best Yankee when I was a kid and he has become a beloved broadcaster who recently was ill. Even the Mets are smart enough to have Keith Hernandez and Ron Darling as broadcasters. But they really missed a bet when they made Willie Randolph the manager instead of Wally Backman. Now Backman got in some beef and they shied away from him. It was a minor arrest or something, I mean for Billy Martin that was just a Tuesday. You need to have your guys through thick and thin.