May 13, 2010

"It doesn't matter what an animal does, or where it does it, it will be deemed fair game for the documentary."

"Human notions of privacy which rest on ideas of location or activity are ignored in terms of animals."

An academic agonizes.

Imagine the roles reversed. The animals somehow take over and they are making David Attenborough-style videos about human beings.... Well, picture this, but with people:

27 comments:

Treacle said...

An ad popped up on this video for "People Mating with Animals - 1000's of Products".

I wonder what products they are talking about. I would imagine lube would be sufficient, but having never mated with an animal, I don't know.

Original Mike said...

And you said you didn't watch pornography.

NoName said...

Another take on Bird Porn : 2008: Exposing the Bird Chastity League with Dave Barry.

traditionalguy said...

That piece strangely looks like girls softball team members playing their game. IMO, it is shameful to use such a film clip now to raise sexuality issues. (Everyone knows that there are nine players on a girls softball team and also nine players on a girls Supreme Court team.) I for one see Elena Kagan as much more than just another animal. She is more like John Harvard the Pilgrim and a friend of Barack Obama's Law School transcript.

Original Mike said...

"Bird porn" is going to get a tag before I do. {sulks}

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Attenborough runs a fowl East Anglia...

East Anglia.. that paragon of ethics.

The Crack Emcee said...

I'm mad...And that's a fact
I found out...Animals don't help
Animal think...They're pretty smart
Shit on the ground...See in the dark.

They wander around like a crazy dog
Make a mistake in the parking lot
Always bumping into things
Always let you down down down down.

They're never there when you need them
They never come when you call them
They're never there when you need them
The never come when you call them down down down down.

I know the animals...Are laughing at us
They don't even know...What a joke is
I won't follow...Animal's advice
I don't care...If they're laughing at us.

They're never there when you need them
They never come when you call them
They're never there when you need them
The never come when you call them down down down down.

They say they don't need money
They're living on nuts and berries
They say animals don't worry
You know animals are hairy?
They think they know what's best
They're making a fool of us
They ought to be more careful
They're setting a bad example
They have untroubled lives
They think everything's nice
They like to laugh at people
They're setting a bad example
(Go ahead) Laugh at me.


Talking Heads, Animals

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

So if filming them mating is unethical.. pray tell what is it to kill them for food?

Unless killing them for food is a loophole.. couldn't the 'advance knowledge' be a worthy loophole too?

Joe said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Joe said...

The video's idiotic narration anthropomorphizing everything animals do is annoying as hell and almost as moronic as the academic who is wasting everyone's money wringing his hands about the animal privacy issue.

Original Mike said...

"A spokesman for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), also said there was no harm in filming wild animals."

When even PETA thinks you're loonie, you've got to ask yourself, "exactly when did I go 'round the bend"?

Diane Wilson said...

My cats would have no qualms about making intrusive videos about people doing.... pretty much anything.

All they lack is a video camera, and internet access so they can post their videos.

Michael said...

My absolute favorite Talking Heads song. The thing I like most about wild animals is when they turn on people who think they can talk to them or think animals are humans only quieter.

garage mahal said...

I can't forgive Discovery for pulling David Attenborough from the U.S. version of Life, and Planet Earth series, and instead giving us fucking Oprah and Sigourney Weaver.

Irene said...

Michael said, "The thing I like most about wild animals is when they turn on people who think they can talk to them or think animals are humans only quieter."

Grizzly Man.

knox said...

Wasn't there a "Crocodile Hunter" imitator who got chomped on the arm recently? I took some satisfaction in seeing that, after he'd circled the thing, poking it about 900 times.

I feel the same way when someone gets gored in that "Running of the Bulls" nonsense.

Anonymous said...

Wonder if this is the same pinhead who always turns up here maundering about signed releases any time you post a photo with people in it.

GV said...

I have filmed wildlife, including the mating act. I don't think the animals really cared. If they retreated, it was from fear not associated with embarrassment.

I've never felt like a member of the paparazzi while filming animals.

I will be filming dolphins and tiger sharks next month. Last time I snapped an image of two dolphins mating. I'll try to respect their privacy more this time.

Our dog has no problem sitting at the end of our bed staring at us. I think it goes both ways. Soon as the dog stops scratching at the bedroom door, I'll start respecting animal privacy, including their emotional orientation.

mgarbowski said...

So did you and Lileks coordinate today? http://lileks.com/bleat/?p=7017 Scroll to the video on the bottom, which features an interview of a guy who wants to ban "bird porn" in which people watch birds mating in the wild. Lileks collaborated with Dave Barry on the video.
If you told me I'd read 2 blog entries with videos about Bird Porn I'd have scoffed.

ErnieG said...

Note to self: If you're ever going to East Anglia, bring bottled water. There seems to be something in the water there.

The Drill SGT said...

best ever nature video. Trust me :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LU8DDYz68kM

Michael said...

Irene: The Grizzly Maze is highly satisfying in the bear bites man category. I am also fond of The Beast in the Garden the tale of animal loving Boulder residents who made the suburbs attractive for cougars. It turns out that they bite. I would love to read something on killer Dolphins, but I expect such a book would be squelched.

Irene said...

"[C]ougars . . . they bite."

Haha.

sonicfrog said...

Hey, can we get more East Anglia e-mails to see what kind of porn this guy watches? I bet it's animal porn.

Albatross said...

I am embarrassed for my kind.

Penny said...

"I am embarrassed for my kind."

Lighten up, birdy. ;)

It's the friggin' internet!

rhhardin said...

Corn reproducing.