October 21, 2013

"Therapeutic cuddling is cuddling designed as a non-sexual way to stimulate oxytocin, the love hormone, which makes you feel safe and connected to others."

"These people are really lonely... There's a lot of need for touch," said the proprietor of Madison's Snuggle House, Matthew Hurtado. The City of Madison seems to be dragging its heels, fretting over the possibility of prostitution, and the place has had to delay opening.

According to Hurtado, there are 300 clients waiting for cuddling sessions, and that if the Madison sugglery is like NY's Snuggery, the clients are likely to be old people who — as the article paraphrases it — have "lost their spouses."

Lost their spouses? That sounds like carelessness. You know how old people are. Yes, they are old, so their spouses are more likely to die than the spouses of younger folk. But it's not the use of loss for death that bothers me. It's "spouse." What's the sex balance in that New York clientele? Are we talking about women and men or mostly (or nearly all or all) men?

Anyway, I note that "The Snuggle House occupies former law offices." Make a list of ways in which snuggling is not like lawyering and, next to it, a list of ways in which they are the same. On which list do you put "raises fear of prostitution"?

ADDED: Comment at the link: "I just know I'm going to get Snuggle House and Waffle House mixed up."

21 comments:

Heartless Aztec said...

I'm in the wrong line of work. 300 clients backed up and waiting for some snuggling and huggling? At what per - $150 an hour billable to Blue Cross? Damn. 6 years of college and the ability to differentiate between Ionic, Corinthian and Doric columns wasted.

Ann Althouse said...

I think it's $60 an hour.

So when you're getting some hugs from someone — whether it's your mom or your "spouse" in those less than fully sexual moments — think: This has a market value of $1 a minute.

I mean I wouldn't hug someone for a full minute for $1. Would you? But when you are snuggling with someone and perhaps thinking this is pretty low key and idle, it might boost your experience to put that market value on it.

Anonymous said...

If The Snugglers Were All Japanese Schoolgirls in Knee-Socks It Could Be a Mighty Franchise, with One By Every Starbux. The Pillow Fights Would Cost an Extra Sixty.

Oso Negro said...

All in all, I would think OM would be more popular.

Anonymous said...

Lots of Asexual Posts of Late: Therapeutic Cuddling, Grass-Eating Men, Celibacy Syndrome in Japan.

From an earlier Althouse Post: "or did you go over to click through to the explanation of why Miss Johansson is the sexiest woman alive?"

I Know Where I Would Click. I Still LIKE to 'Click'. I Have No Wish to Eat Grass.

Naomi said...

As a (young) widow myself, I'm not sure why you ask if most of those who've "lost their spouse" would be men. Statistically women make a significant majority of that catagory.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

The City of Madison seems to be dragging its heels...

That's a shame.

Anonymous said...

Re: Is there a name for that form of joke, where you perceive a word inside another word?

Therapeutic cuddling = Rape Cud.

Note a Joke, But Perhaps a Problematic Overlap.

Freeman Hunt said...

If you asked the right person at Waffle House, I bet he'd snuggle you.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Therapeutic cuddling

TML said...

There's still a Snuggery in Schaumburg IL, if people need alcoholic cuddling that sort of sounds like snuggling (but isn't).

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

A waffling snuggle flip flops.

Madison panics.

Paddy O said...

1 Kings 1:1 When King David was very old, he could not keep warm even when they put covers over him. 2So his attendants said to him, “Let us look for a young virgin to serve the king and take care of him. She can lie beside him so that our lord the king may keep warm.”

3Then they searched throughout Israel for a beautiful young woman and found Abishag, a Shunammite, and brought her to the king. 4The woman was very beautiful; she took care of the king and waited on him, but the king had no sexual relations with her.

Ron said...

The SnuggleWaffel were the armed forces of the Plushie Third Reich...

Heartless Aztec said...

@Althouse - I'm not wrapping my arms around whoever walks through the door for $60. I'd hire staff @$20 per for that. Though (being the elderly dirty old man that I am) standing behind the one way mirror and diverting the occasional well kept +50 year old hottie could be a business perk.

Rocketeer said...

I'm reminded of Tobias Funke from Arrested Development, when he was billing himself as the world's first analyst/therapist, "or analrapist, if you will." The business card were hilarious.

MadisonMan said...

I know it's easy to make fun of this, but I can see the value in it for some. I couldn't handle a full 60 minutes of snuggling. Maybe 30.

Hold me 'til I fall asleep, then wake me at the 60-minute mark.

IF I used something like this, which I won't, but I'm sure there are people who need it, and Madison is all worried about how to oversee it, as is typical. There is more city oversight in Madison than anywhere in the country. That's why I pay $9000/year in taxes on a modest house.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I know it's easy to make fun of this, but I can see the value in it for some.

MM cut me in some of that Cuddling Cam will you?

William said...

Buy a large dog or go to a prostitute. I can see the therapeutic value of hugging dogs and young, attractive women, but I have no wish to hug any other mammals. And that includes cats.

Alex said...

I'm sorry but fake hugs from a stranger doesn't help. It's another sign of our sick, sick, sick society. Yes we need more love, but not this way.

Alex said...

Paddy O - good thing we don't structure our society on the "Holy Bible" anymore.